I was dieting. The kind of dieting where you are super motivated and the feeling of hunger only confirms that you are cutting back. Well, I had been doing this for about 2 weeks. Usually, when I diet, I lose weight really quick especially the first few weeks. Well, we were getting ready to go to a graduation party and all of my pants felt so tight. I knew I should be a little bit bloated because it was time for my period. I sat in my room and just felt like crying. I was in one of those moods, too. One of those that you feel like hiding under a blanket and going to sleep. So, I pulled myself together and put on a pair of comfy black pants and complained to Phillip the whole way there that something had to be wrong with me! I was sitting in Carey Hilliards and it hit me that I was 8 days late. I was very bloated. I was very moody. Oh dear Lord. Am I pregnant? My thoughts quickly left as my 11 month old screamed at Brodie demanding his cup.
The next day was a Saturday, Sept. 19th. Me and the kids were at Walmart picking up a prescription for Brodie and we were about to meet my mom for lunch. I was at the check out line at the pharmacy and as I turned around the pregnancy test was glaring at me. I told Cheyanne, "I'm 9 days late, I'm going to get one just to make sure." I couldn't be pregnant. Paisley was 11 months old. It took me 2 years to get pregnant with her. I was done having children. Two was perfect. I check out and tell Cheyanne to watch the kids while I go to restroom. Miss priss says "take your test since you're going!" So, I listen to the 15 year old and take it with me. I take and there it is, 2 lines. I don't remember much next. I somehow made it to my car and loaded the kids. Well, Cheyanne probably loaded them because she knew I was shocked. I called Phillip...he was shocked too.
This was WAY different than finding out with the first 2. I was anxious and desiring with my whole heart with Brodie and Paisley. This pregnancy was unexpected and not planned...not desired. I felt happy, then sad, and then scared all at once. Poor Paisley...she didn't have her time as the baby. Poor Brodie...two babies in the house. Poor me.....I wanted to lose Paisley's baby weight first and I wanted to get in shape and I wanted to have two babies! Then, I felt this wave of guilt hit me. How dare me??? This is so unfair to this baby. He/She deserves the same excitement as the other two. So, I had my 10 minute melt down and then I became excited. I called Amanda first....she was shocked and happy. She is so much like me. Silence and laughter filled my ears. Then I called Dustin and told him. His words were my strength and I'll never forget them. He said automatically "You are building the best life for your children." I thought to myself "Yes, I am!" My brothers and sister are my best friends, the only people in this world that fully understand me, and my life shared with them has been the best. I'm giving my children siblings to do life with...what a gift. I told Brodie and he laughed. He said "No you dont mama."
We met mama at Chili's. We had our usual greeting and she talked to the kids. Brodie said "Gamma, Gamma! Mama has another baby in her tummy!!" Mama looked at me and I handed her the pregnancy test. She sat it down and said "What? Are you serious?" She was shocked and then busted out laughing. It was such a funny moment. I think she could tell I was just as shocked. I called David and Megan and my daddy too and told them. Everyone was so excited to grow our family.
I didn't a chance to see Mrs. Tina because she worked late and Sunday we went to church and got home later and she wasn't home. So, I finally see her on Monday. She was cooking dinner and I said "I have to tell you something." She said, "I already know, your pregnant." I said "How do you know???" She said "I could tell when you were upset Friday night at Carey Hilliards." I thought that was so funny. Pa teared up, of course, and they were both happy about another grandbaby.
I told a few close friends and family members. I went to my first appointment on October 9th. I was only 7 weeks and the baby looked healthy. Heartbeat was 157.
Amanda took photos of Brodie and Paisley for their birthdays so we did a few announcements. We announced baby #3 with this photo.
I am 13 weeks now and I couldn't be happier. A few months ago, Brodie told me that when he was in heaven there were 3 of them. I guess he was right. God has blessed me with the gift of children and I am so grateful. I love being a mother.
This pregnancy has been so different. I am showing so fast, I haven't been nearly as sick as I was with the first two, and I'm exhausted. I am ready for some energy back. :)
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Love Notes