Thursday, December 17, 2015

Good Good Father.

Do you ever have one of those days? A day that you just feel discouraged?

I'm a happy, positive person. 
If I am ever feeling down, I give myself a good pep talk and I'm usually good to go.
But....
I'm human too.

I have struggles and fears and set backs.  

My social media outlets usually reflect all things good. I promise that I'm not trying to create a fake impression of myself and my family. I've always been a big believer in positive speaking and encouragement. My husband, my children, my family, & my friends fill my life with so much joy. 

Well, yesterday was one of THOSE days. You know the days that you just want to throw a huge pity party. It was a good day too, though. My brother spent that afternoon with us at work. Work was good. But I was just in one of those funks.

On the way home from work,  my mind was going 100 miles per hour. I was having a battle within my mind with God. Ya know, a good ole fashioned pity party....

Paisley was miserable due to teething...I could tell she was in so much pain. NOTHING was giving her any relief. God, where are you?

Phillip was hurting and was sick.  I was so worried about him & he was being stubborn & not going to the doctor. God, where are you??

Baby Jed was still hurting. My pastors were hurting because he was hurting. They just want some answers, God! Where are you?

We had an unexpected HUGE bill come up that has to be paid before Christmas. Why now? God, where are you?

I have a friend that is struggling with depression. I've been praying for her for a LONG time. God where are you?

I have family members that want children. God, where are you??

Our past always has a way of haunting us. I want it to be over. God, help us!

My prayer list is filled with sick babies, people hurting and having hard times. God, where are you?

By this time...tears filled my eyes and I just felt like going into a full meltdown & I look into my rear view mirror.

With all my thoughts, I didn't notice my music. 

"Good Good Father" was playing & Brandon Holt (a family friend) was singing his heart out. Find it and download it on itunes. 

Brodie B. had one hand stretched across to Paisley holding her hand, the other hand raised to heaven, and his eyes closed. His mouth was moving but I couldn't hear him because of the music. 

I watched in awe & my pity party ended. I threw my hands up too. I just threw myself into the presence of God. My pity party turned into a praise party right in my car. 

After a few minutes, I looked back and Brodie was gazing out the window.  I said "Brodie, what were you doing just now?" He said "Mama, I was listening to that song and it said that I was loved by a good father. I was just telling Him that I loved him too and so did Paisley and mama and daddy." 

Whew. Okay, God. I know EXACTLY where you are. 

"You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:13




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